Living with a mother with chronic depression: to tell or not to tell?

Background: While there is mounting evidence that children of mothers with depression are at risk for increased psychopathology and disturbed family relationships, it is not yet known what the children's lives are like growing up with their mothers' depression. The purpose of the study was to understand children's experiences of living with mothers who have depression: specifically, how these children understand disclosing their experiences to others. Method: Eight interviews were conducted with adult children of mothers with depression. Grounded theory methodology was used to collect and analyze the data. Results: We identified three types of disclosing: self-disclosing, first disclosing, and selective disclosing. As the children grew up and began to understand their mothers' differentness as an illness, then as depression, their ways of disclosing changed, as did what they disclosed, where, when, and for what purposes. Most significantly, what is disclosed changed remarkably over time, depending on the offspring's perceptions of their mother's problem, the safety of disclosing, and the purpose and anticipated consequences of disclosing. Conclusion: The results indicate that disclosing is not a single event but rather occurs in various forms, repeatedly, over time and in response to several factors.